“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” –Epicurus
Few people are content with life just the way it is, no matter what stage of life they are in or how much they have to be grateful for. Most people seem to always believe that true happiness is just a little farther down the road, when they have what their hearts desire. Such people will probably never find true happiness unless they make a basic change in their way of thinking. The problem is that much of the pleasure we get from material items comes from looking forward to having things we think will add to our happiness. Once we get them, we find that we still have a yearning for other things that we do not have, so we set new goals that we think we have to achieve in order to be happy.
Let’s suppose a young couple, who are deeply in love, begin their lives living in poverty. They have an old car that is not very dependable and live in a cheap rented apartment. Their dreams for the future include someday owning a large house in a very nice neighborhood and driving a new luxury automobile. Further suppose their dreams of the “good life” motivate them to work hard, and by the time they become senior citizens, their dreams have come true. Will they be a lot happier in their senior years than they were when they were young and struggling to make ends meet? Not necessarily.
I don’t believe that anyone ever finds happiness through material wealth alone. It is far more important to have someone to love who loves you back than it is to accumulate wealth. If the young couple’s love endures, and they are blessed with healthy loving children, they have everything required for basic happiness while they are still young. The joy of raising children and watching them turn into productive young adults is hard to match. And the treasure of having a loving and faithful spouse with whom to share both the joys and concerns of life is one of the greatest contributors to happiness.
Life is a journey–not a destination. The goal should be to be happy throughout life’s journey. Abraham Lincoln once said, “I think most people are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Like so many of Lincoln’s words, I think these hit the nail right on the head. Happiness is not about what we have or don’t have. It is about the way we think. If we want to be truly happy, we must make up our minds to try to be happy no matter what the circumstances of life. If we make our happiness conditional on achieving certain goals or acquiring material wealth, we will never be happy until and unless we get everything we want. We don’t have to get what we want in order to be happy. We can be happy without getting everything we want, if we make up our minds to be and try to cultivate our thinking in a way that enhances our happiness.
Think about it.
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Copyright 2025
Allen W. Smith