“A ship ought not to be held by one anchor, nor life by a single hope.”
–Epictetus
Although most of us have many positive experiences as we travel life’s journey, life is certainly not a bed of roses for any of us. In addition to the positive experiences, life also brings many disappointments. One way to minimize the pain that comes from disappointment is to avoid pinning all our hope on a single goal. Some things work out in life, and some things don’t. Therefore, the more goals we have, and the more things we try, the greater the likelihood that we will have at least some successes.
None of us is born with just a single talent, and we can all be successful in more than one field of endeavor. It is okay to try to succeed in whatever field we choose, but we should not pin all our hopes on that endeavor, and we should be willing to change course if that becomes necessary.
The same is true of relationships with people. Those who have a best friend whom they can always count on are very fortunate indeed, but none of us should rely on a single person to meet all our emotional needs. First of all, no single person is capable of providing all the emotional support needed by another individual. Secondly, it is not fair to expect so much from one person.
We all need mutual support relationships with others. Family members, neighbors, friends and colleagues from work are all important in the lives of most individuals. We are all sailing the same ship of life, and we are all on our last voyage. We have a responsibility to our fellow human beings. We should always be willing to extend a helping hand to others just as we should be able to expect others to give us a hand when we are down.
We should be especially careful not to totally drain the batteries of others while recharging our own. Sometimes, some of us demand so much emotional support from a spouse, parent or adult child that we rob them of a life of their own. This is a special problem for some adult children whose parents expect them to devote so much time and emotional support to them that the children are prevented from having independent lives of their own. In loving families, there is mutual support between parents and their adult children, and neither demands more than the other is capable of giving. In the words of Abraham Lincoln, “Love is the chain by which to bind children to their parents.” Unfortunately, in some cases, parents make demands on their adult children and use guilt as the mechanism of control. Likewise, some children make excessive demands on their parents.
We are given one life from God when we are born, and I believe God wants us to enjoy that life and to use it as best we can to make this a better world.
Think about it.
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Copyright 2024
Allen W. Smith
